Saturday, September 29, 2012


So much, too much, or should I say overload. So many things went through from ups and down. You'll never know where a person go when he/she doesn't update themselves. This year is my last year of Diploma, graduated on April officially on June. Started work from May while I wait for my official graduation ceremony. Decided to resign at the end of August. I'm jobless for the whole September. I'm now officially hired again and became a worker as an account clerk on the 1st of Oct till present. 

During my working or should I say graduation mood. Each of my classmate already decided on what they want to do. But what about myself?? I'm still searching for courses, Uni, country and places that suit me. While I was working (before I resign), I kept on complaining on how I hate my job and how I love my study life. Yes! Working is just a horrible thing when its not one of my favorite. I never like accounting nor financial. I like managing especially event management (even tho include budgeting, financial) 

But I somehow doesn't even think that I perfect for event management. I want something different than others. I like arts and entertainment more but I'm so stupid in technology, system, and all those adobe function. I don't know how to use photoshop wtf. Hahaha no kidding man. NO ONE TEACH ME! and I don't even own the software, you need to buy lah. 

Anyway I'm still thinking what should I study. Yes I start to be independent a little bit. I have this some sort of trauma when I was 17, I can't be left alone I'll scared to death. Slowly things became different and slowly I'm back with my 30% old self that likes to stay alone but there must be things that distract me. hahaha I'm a coward.

People surround me either get a job, study overseas, get married, or just stay at home. There's a time where my friend went overseas to study suddenly appeared back. While he/she avoid me like a celebrity being caught  by the reporter either having affair with another person or being hunt by the police. A lot of thinking running through my mind that time. I was so speechless that time. I want to call he/she or run at him/her but my body and mouth doesn't seems to move or talk at all. 

I was stunted and speechless by him/her present. I never thought things could happen like this. I don't know what happen to him/ her but all I was thinking was why and how! So many curiosity running through my mind. But I pretend that nothing happen and never met during the occasion. I asked my parents about it. There's lots of possibility could happen. 

I couldn't express through my twitter and fb because he/she might notice that I've notice him/her. So if he/she saw this blog update of mine all I hope he/she was doing fine. Because I really cried the whole night thinking all the sweet, happy and fun memories we had and always pray for you whenever I remember you after I know that he/she went to oversea to study. Even though curiosity still running but I'll just let him/her explain whenever he/she wants to. I'll just wait for you to explain yourself. I won't ask until you're willing to blurt out everything yourself to me. When times come I'll know the answer. 

ARGHH!! So much of complaining about my life. Does it even sound like complaining. I hope not hahahaha. I have nothing to say to write now. Buhbye. God Bless. Cheers. :)

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