To all salesman

Like hello!!!! Get the way out? Yes I'm referring to you you You YOU! Its no point selling me anything. I seriously hate sales person. Yes its great to have great sales and enjoy the benefit buying from sales person. But then what if I don't want. Can you see its so hard to reject the offer especially you meet your long lost primary friend and he started talking about insurances.

I was like 'Can you stop talking about your job, its nothing interesting!' 'And stop selling me something'. When I was thinking all of this I unconsciously skip part of the things he was saying. Its so hard to concentrate when people start selling, its like reading or study. You know what I mean? Unless I am really interested in your insurance or any other product then I don't mind listening but now no. I have no money, I'm jobless (I told him I'm still working lollllll), I'm busy setting my business. I HAVE NO TIME FOR YOUR INSURANCE TALK!!!! 

When we meet we should talk about our high school life & our times when we were young & how the others are doing right now. NOT START TALKING ABOUT YOUR SALES. OMG I need a break, I've encountered too much sales person that I really hate because I soon will become one NOO!! I'm seriously not good in socializing anyway so don't call me ever. We even exchange contact just now! OMG Please don't find me. 

Every time I've met people its like I try to avoid talking cause I don't know what to talk nor say. Its like my head trying to find stupid topic to talk about, like seriously. So hard to find topic to new people or people that we've haven't talk for so long. I like to talk when I understand them and they understand me so its great. Anyway I'm not good in socializing need to practice hard on that part. sigh. 

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Till then,

Cheers & God Bless

Excuses

Hi! Am I doing it right or what? I just agreed to stay till end of May. This is the second time I've agreed to my boss that I'd delay a little bit longer. I am so worried that when the day come for the replacement she won't appear. I really hope she come to replace me so I could hand over everything. All the work I've been handling is really a lot. Like seriously a lot even my supervisor doesn't even know. Not to mention now I've kept forgetting things which makes my work even harder. I couldn't concentrate, I feel tired and unmotivated at all. All I do was waiting for my vacation for the day to arrive.

Also I was so excited with the trip on sat, that I've already pack my clothes except for toiletries. My mom was like are you kidding me??? Yeap I've pack my clothes. Probably going to wear the same clothes on June trip again! Recycle comfy clothes on the trip is my essential! haha You know I'm into fashion lately but I has no money to spend. Maybe I'm going to save more on this sat trip and spend a fortune on June trip. June trip is like the most expensive trip I've been to and the most excited ever!! Its a foreign country so I'm excited as fuck!!! GAHHH HOLIDAY WHY U NO COME FASTER AND SLOW DOWN WHEN I'M ALREADY ON HOLIDAY??

Where's all the time we've been doing?? Time is money people! Means more booking, more income, more vacation!!! I'm excited that this year my calender is all pack with awesome event & booking! but I need my holiday right now!!! Oh btw I'm watching a new Korean variety series called Roommate! I love Park Bom! She's awesome and funny! Go watch! Bye

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Till then,

Cheers & God Bless

Family being mehhh

From the outside it looks like they were being supportive but deep down inside they are expecting me to fail and stop all these impossible to happen kind of job I'm pursuing. I understand that because I'm an amateur. Being jobless and doing things from scratch is really hard. All the planning is already making me really tired. Even though it was really tired but I'm happy. Even all the things didn't go accordingly I am happy with it. I think and solved it properly without abandon any of the task I'm facing. 

Unlike with my current job. I purposely abandon all the work, pretend that I forget when I'm not, delayed everything for almost a year. How awesome is that. Yeah I'm being such childish ever in my life. At least I'm getting back in track again with my current shit job, cause I don't want to give bad impression (which already have) even worst. I just hope that the person who is going to replace me doesn't back out, like really, like seriously don't back out. I want to get over with these job A.S.A.P but my mom was like stay there if that replacement doesn't want to replace my position. Obvious intention mom. 

My mom wanted me to stay there as long as possible but I couldn't, I hate it so much that the work load was purposely abandon. How could I even stay at there longer? I just couldn't do it. Now to compensate my shit behavior I'm going to clear out everything I could so that my replacement could suffer less. lol Which probably going to be easy for her as if she just went to work just like going to vacation. Oh please hurry up time!! Let me go to vacation! When its vacation time I hope the time just slow down. I'm just being bitchy sometimes. Thank for reading my shit life here. 

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Till then,

Cheers & God Bless

Random Thoughts : Vacation & Reality

I cannot wait for the time to come to go on vacation! Its been awhile since I've go to any vacation. I long for it. As time approaching, I find myself stuck. I've delayed another 2 weeks before new colleague is going take over my job. Maybe because I still felt insecure right now. So I try to stay as long as I could in this shit company. In the same time I couldn't wait to get over it.

Things hasn't going good lately. I get good respond but I couldn't get any customer for the moment yet. Its just 1 sample and its not enough. I need more sample to convince them I am the best. As I looked through all people who is in the same path I'm going, it seems that there are way more than I've expected. Ads keep popping up from the same field I'm in. I couldn't possibly do any ads with all the expenses I have accumulated. I need a decent plan for now. 

Planning is not easy. Plan A not working, go for Plan B, if not C, D or more. I'm working on it. Even if parents were pouring reality on me, I still believe that I could achieve it. I just need some proper plan and time. I can do it!!!!!!! Never give up!!! There's a lot of people really inspired me to go for my dream, it encourage me a lot. 

Sometimes I do felt like I could burst out anytime, when my partner is just being low class. Maybe because I've got influenced by all those from people surrounding me. I think differently. I act like a high class people when I'm not. Because that's how society do now days. You have to act in order to get attention. Being pure hearted or honest could sometimes destroy everything. So I set a high standard when I know I'm not in that level yet. Because I wanted to be the best. 

Everyone is dressing up, expensive dinner, expensive gadget, that's how we are now. We are setting it a high standard because everyone started to judge, from head to toe. It was not long ago I was off from work, I somehow unexpected wearing really old shirt to a mall. I felt embarrassed, really embarrassed. I felt out of the place, I felt ugly, I felt fat, everyone is judging at my appearance, I wanted to run away, hiding somewhere that no one could judge me. This is reality. Everyone judge. Its getting sick. 

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Till then,

Cheers and God Bless.

Move forward

Starting up was not easy. We still have a lot of things to prepare before the shoot begins. Everything goes on smoothly. Only worried that the sample is not ready till the promotion ends. It's been awesome week. My parent's support felt weird to me although I've already knew how they would react. But everything is so surreal right now. I need to slap my face again. lol I cannot wait to start off our sample shoot. 

Its going to be awesome. Still have a lot of things to go through, back drop, accessories, lighting and etc. We are starting small but we hope we can go big enough to be international recognized. I have bigger dream! But I'm still moving forward one step at a time. I don't want to rush anything and just go with the plan we arranged and go for it. Its going to be awesome indeed! Also even when I do photography doesn't mean that I won't do any else. I'm learning to make video! I'm growing and learning more. Just hope that everything will be fine and awesome! 

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Till then,

Cheers and God Bless. 

Thank You Post

Hi Monkey Girl! Just in case you are going to read this blog again lol. Thank You for your great motivation. Even just a word it really makes a big deal for me. I felt really touched and motivated! This blog has been really private. I share to no one at all when I've graduated from high school so I only have a few reader on this blog than the other one that I've always shared. Anyway, let's Hi five for being 22 *virtual high5* 

You know taking risk of being jobless is hard especially when I personally don't even know what will happen 3 months later. But of course I have other optional for working back on what I'm certified as an account student. No worries about that. I still can start over by getting a job and when I'm ready I'm going for it again until I can earn income from my dream job.  We're still young! 

Telling parents about this is really great but I've always aimed for timing. When its the suitable time I'll eventually tell my parents about it. I'm just scared that they weren't as supportive and oppose my decision. I'll get through about that soon. haha

Oh btw I love Kuching!! Crazy about their cheap and delicious food! Can't wait to go there again! Thank You again Monkey Girl!

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Till then,

Cheers & God Bless. 

A little bit of Motivation

Its been so much of an overwhelming week. I couldn't believe that its already the end of March soon. I promise myself that I would brave up myself and told my parents about my plan, my future. But its so hard to speak out. So I'm still keeping everything to myself except for the partner I'm working with. I just keep everything from my parents and rather to spurt out everything in the social media. Not all was reveal cause I wanted to keep it to myself until it was a success plan to reveal everything. I'm that kind of person that don't even want to talk anything because its not worth to talk about it anyway. Maybe some day or one day I will talk everything about it. 

I've been reading lots of motivation quotes from people I've admire from bloggers to celebrities. It really push up my spirit to pursue for what I belong. A place where I should belong. Of course there's uncertainties because we haven't officially start to get any client so we don't know how it will goes. There maybe difficulties coming towards us soon but I know in the end of the success its going to all worth it. No Pain No Gain. 

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Till then,

Cheers and God Bless