Freaking weather

Its been crazily hot, I mean after CNY its getting hotter and hotter by day even at night. I could literally sweat like mad cow without even exercise. Especially when I'm running errand outside on the noon it literally burns my skin. My arms are so tan right now I don't even need to go sun tanning at all. With just 1 hour of sun is enough for me to get tan skin.

Oh I even sweat so much that my weight drop. LOL I practically loss weight from all the heat of the sun while running some errands. I don't know if it a good thing or not. Not to mention the construction site is building up. All the dust and sand literally makes our house really dirty some more with no rain making it more worst to the air. The air is so dirty that sometimes I could feel like I couldn't breathe at all. Even shutting down all the window is just making the house stuffy. 

I miss having those days where we would wear sweaters at night and the rain is pouring down making me want some hot choco while cuddling with my huge comfy blanket. ahhh I miss those day! Definitely going to wait till end of the year where monsoon weather is invading the cities. I'm sweater weather girl ya know. Need some rain! Rain oh rain please fall down so that the haze doesn't get worst. Need some fresh air man.

VOOMEI.BLOGSPOT.COM

Till then,

Cheers and God Bless

In Doubt

I am seriously terrified by all the decision I've made lately. I get so insecure right now. I think I'm getting more worried when I stop full time working to pursue my passion. It is so scary and so uncertain about my future right now. That's why they say going for our dreams is hard and risky. Because I have no proper income, expenses is really huge right now. Even tho I've only planned all the expenses needed it really doesn't seems to cover up for another 3 months when I'm going to start. 

So practically I'm going to be jobless, no income, no customer and all the money I've save up for this dream only get lasted for the next 3 months after I've completely resign from my current work. With the suddenly expenses rising up and all the cost I need to pursue my dream is terrifying! 

I started to get stress from it, all the sudden plan and arrangement is making me so stress up! All the stuff I'm preparing is getting on properly. Its almost 50% done before I could set up other stuff. So much things to do yet so little time, not to mention all the expenses pilling up! 

Sometimes my partner thinks that these dream is so easy to fulfilled but actually its not. Just with my own start up its making me headache. I had to plan properly for it so that I could survive for the next 3 months lol Gahhh I just hope everything goes on smoothly and well planned. My mom is going to be so pissed at my decision. Oh well life still goes on. I don't want to regret. 

Till then,

Cheers and God Bless.

It's Happening

I can't believed I've already made the decision to resign. I've never felt this happier ever in my life. But I do somehow get insecure because I'm taking a risk for being jobless for the next 1 month time. Which means no income for me to start my own freelance work. It's happening right now! I can feel it. I'm making plans for all the things I need to buy (means a lot of expenses as well) I'm hopping the budget I have now could really go through it till I've got my first customer. 

To tell you the truth, I'm afraid of this failure even when I haven't even started planning yet. Cause this is so big risk to me. I'm doing this because of my passion and I want to make my dream comes true! What not doing things I like than struggling everyday hating the job I hate working. I wanted to go through my life meaningful without regrets.

We may fall down through this journey but I'm sure it will be worth it. I really hope that my family would be proud of my success. I want to make my passion a success! Let along this journey begins! Do visit my main blog voomei.blogspot.com for more updates and all the happening that is going through out this journey! 

Till then,

Cheers and God Bless.

Its Time

The day has finally come. Its the day where, I figure it out that I couldn't hold it anymore, the day that I have to get away from these miserable life of mine. I've been waiting for more than 6 months or more than that, waiting for boss to lecture me about the life of being a successful account executive. Once and for all it happened to be today. I cannot believe boss finally told me that I could do better and the stories goes on. That's where I realized I've endured and secure this position for too long.

Last year, around this time of the month I was waiting to resign and get better job offered but I'd stayed. After all the tremendous amount of interview session I realized that money and position as account is not what I want. I want to fulfilled my passion. My longing passion that I've kept aside. Because I told myself that I still can endured until I found a job that is my dream job. Now I even realized that I can't pursue my dream because I am in the constant pause. I kept delaying and torturing myself with the current work which makes my life miserable.

No matter how I endured to secure this job I hate it, I'm constantly losing motivation to move on. I told myself I could stay at this current company until I'm old enough to replace the current Executive. But I was wrong, Because I knew that I hate my current job, I couldn't solve any problem, I couldn't think straight, I couldn't absorb all the things I've wanted to work on later, I couldn't move on and learn more. I STOPPED. My heart has finally stop all these endurance I'm giving to myself and telling me to move on a better job that I've always dreamt off. 

Finally its time to say goodbyes to the current one and pursue what I've kept aside. Wish me luck!

Till then,

Cheers and God Bless

What The Fuck Am I Thinking?

Good job opportunity is in front of me. I just wouldn't want to step forward. Not at all. My mind says go for that abundant money but my heart refuses to accept it even with the current work I'm working. I have no heart to work further anymore. I couldn't get hold on myself. Seriously. I get better offer this time more better than the previous one that I've rejected. 

I promised myself that in 2014 I will grab the opportunities in front of me. I really wanted to grab and venture different company but I'm not happy at. I'M NOT HAPPY AT ALL. No matter how much money I earn from work, I'm still not happy. Because I'm not doing things I like. I hate it seriously. Even if I rejected the offer would I be better later? I don't think so. Its going to be same.

Everyone said that its easy to move forward when there's opportunities but what if its not the one that I like? Whats the purpose anyway? Unless I take the risk to really go for my passion. Its a big risk tho. With no proper income, with all the expenses covered by my own, fighting with creativity, get own client. How am I going to that? Its not easy to take risk, even business has their own risk. Each step we took has the risk. 

AM I GOING FOR MY PASSION OR JUST STAY AT THE SAME PACE TILL I ROTE TO DEATH?

Decision Decision Decision

Till then,

Cheers and God Bless. 

Midnight strike

Sometimes I really don't know what I want. At first I thought that money wins everything. As long as there is money in front of me I'll take it. But everything that involved money has a risk. I do somehow wonder what if I take that opportunity in front of me? What is my changes? Because I declined that offer. I rejected that money to change into a new environment but still the job I hate the most. 

So I was thinking that, maybe I should just keep going for what I have now, maybe I'll wait a little longer things might change as well but it takes longer. I choose the longer way to go for my passion. But I believe the longer I wait the better I will be. As a human of course we are in greed of certain things, but sometimes we need to choose to let go. Because let go doesn't mean good and it doesn't mean bad as well, it depends. So being optimistic is they way to go through all the things no matter how hard it is.

I want to promise to myself within 1 or 2 years later I am able to go for my passion I've always wanted. I don't want to just talked about it and then regret of not doing anything of it. I'm taking things step by step. Going to look for inspiration, location, budget and travelling.

Speaking of travelling its really crazy I think! This year I'm going to travel to 4 places. IT IS UNBELIEVABLE! My 2014 wishlist is definitely came true! I promise myself I should travel as much as possible before I'm getting old. Because I wanted to document all the place I've visited and make it as a memory to be able to share to my child and grandchildren. 

I felt that travelling is a great thing because we enjoy other countries culture and amazing scenery that we've never seen before. Therefore, I'm saving more money for DSLR! So I can capture the most amazing picture as well as shopping till I drop lol. Hope this DSLR thing would come true! hahaha Save money! ush ush ush

Don't forget to visit my main blog for more general updates and event! voomei.blogspot.com

Till then,

Cheers and God Bless. 

I need holiday

I am feeling so exhausted lately. All the mentality torturing is horrible. I HATE TO WORK IN FRONT OF THE DESK EVERYDAY WITH NO PASSION AND DREAM. Its great to get income from work but all the mentality torture is difficult to handle. No matter how easy or hard is. I really need to relax. 

I just went to interview today. Before that interview part, my current supervisor already suspicious of me for wanting to leave the company. Fuck you supervisor, for all the trouble you throw to me no matter how big or small is I ENDURED! Been following all the thing you've asked. So hard to have a poker face whenever you throw the blame on me. 

So I went to interview with 50% of confidence and 50% of doubt. Of course doubt surpassed the confidence. They asked way too much, so much that they even want to know my hobbies and interest! I even blurred out that I do blog, which I am. I was like NUUUUUUUUU!!!!!! They know I do blog they must be wanting to checked out what I was thinking and saying all those bad stuff like now. HAHAHA Can't they just leave my personal life alone!? I need privacy as well. 

I even blurred out nonsense when I was interviewed. I couldn't think properly at all. Basically their working environment doesn't match with my style. JOB IN MALAYSIA IS NO FUN! I MEAN ALL THE JOB IN THE WORLD IS NO FUN! :(

So I went back to office doing nothing. Seeing my supervisor went out shopping with her daughter really irks me to punch her in the face. My supervisor can go out doing her personal stuff everyday but when we went out for awhile we get questioned. The heck is this people think about. 

Everything happened really fast right now. I couldn't catch up with the happenings. I just want to relax and cry out loud and sleep. I'm so tired right now that I might break down anytime soon. I couldn't stand up properly right now. 

But I'm so thankful that my friends are here for me. Especially Diana, she called me while I was writing this post. I felt better with just a short conversation. It released my tension a bit, makes me even want to cry more. T______T It was not easy to please this society even if I haven't even step into a bigger world yet. I'm not sure if I can take the stress when I am pursuing my passion.

My dream and passion is a place where they critic my work no matter how good or bad it is. How am I going to encounter this stress alone? I think I need more time to make it work on. Its going to take a long time but I hope its going to be worth. Hopefully. 

Till then,

Cheers and God Bless.